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Baptism of an Irish Drunk

Irish man is stumbling through the woods, totally drunk, when he
comes upon a preacher baptizing people in the river. He proceeds into
the water, subsequently bumping into the preacher. The preacher turns
around and is almost overcome by the smell of alcohol, whereupon, he
asks the drunk, "Are ye ready to find Jesus?" The drunk shouts,
"Yesh Father, I am."

So the preacher grabs him and dunks him in the water. He pulls him
back and asks, "Brother, have ye found Jesus?" The drunk replies,
"No, I haven't (hic) found Jaysus!" The preacher, shocked at the answer,
dunks him again but for a little longer. He again pulls him out of the
water and asks, "Have ye found Jesus, brother?" The drunk answers,
"No, I haven' found Jayshus!"

By this time, the preacher is at his wits end and dunks the drunk
again -- but this time holds him down for about 30 seconds, and when
he begins kicking his arms and legs about, he pulls him up.

The preacher again asks the drunk, "Fer the love of God man, have ye found Jesus?"

(get ready for this)

The drunk staggers upright, wipes his eyes, coughs up a bit of water,
catches his breath, and says to the preacher,

"Are you sure (urp) thish is where the fecker fell in?�

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